Shoes, Ships, and Sealing Wax

Maryland, My...where?

Last week, "Deficit-Wracked Maryland Calls It Quits" was a front-page story in The Onion.

Then, New Yorkers in a "Mob for fun" "acted like tourists from Maryland" in a high-end Soho shoe store.

Maryland?

When did Maryland end up on the map?

Well, in 1634, actually. But in my lifetime as a Marylander I have gotten used to the fact that we are an unremarkable state. People don't know where we are...I was on the phone with a technical support person in Colorado the other day who asked about the summer we were having here in New England.

Or worse, they don't know what we are: I did, for about two years, move away...five states south. One day I stopped at the drug store wearing a University of Maryland shirt. The clerk said "Nice shirt...where is that?"

My shirt just said "University of Maryland," and had the old school seal, which is very similar to the state seal, so I thought she meant "Which school in the University of Maryland system?"

I said "College Park."

She looked at me blankly. Well, I wasn't in ACC country, so I elaborated "It's just north of D.C."

She still looked confused, which confused me, until finally she asked "In what state?"

I wasn't sure how to answer. Obviously there was "Maryland is a state!" But I was horrified...I'm not a geography whiz, but I recognize the names of all fifty states, even if I can't remember the exact placement of all the square ones out west. And doesn't every kid learn the thirteen original colonies in history? And isn't Maryland famous for...well...

In Tennessee I did see a "Maryland Fried Chicken" restaurant. That reminded me that my uncle, who also grew up in Maryland, saw Maryland Fried Chicken on a menu in Belgium. He asked the waiter exactly what that meant, and the waiter very knowledgably explained that it was chicken pieces batter fried with bananas, just like they do it in Maryland.

Bananas. Funny, I never saw the banana boats docked on the Chesapeake Bay. (Bay-o. We say baaaay-o. Daylight come and me wanna go home.) And I thought our steamed crabs were universal, but when I was living in that southern state I finally found Old Bay in the exotic spice aisle of a gourmet shop, not next to the salt and pepper in the supermarket like I do here at home.

If we're being nationally mocked, though, complete recognition, even by dim-witted drug store clerks, can not be far behind.

Posted by Nic at 07.29.03 20:26